ย 
Search

๐ŸŽ Naked Confidenceโ„ข Advent Calendar - A to C ๐ŸŽ




Welcome to my Advent Calendar! ๐Ÿ˜๐ŸŽ‰


Rather than chocolates, throughout December I will be revealing new aspects of Naked Confidenceโ„ข (1 per day on LinkedIn, grouped together here every Friday for ease) ๐ŸŽ


And hopefully by Christmas you will be feeling positive, inspired, and of course Nakedly Confident! ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ช



๐ŸŽ First, A is for AWARENESS ๐ŸŽ


And it's fitting we're starting with this because I say to my clients,


๐ŸŒŸ Self-Awareness is the first step.



You have to start by building your AWARENESS of your thoughts and feelings


- if you don't have that, you won't know that you would benefit from changing them


(usually to something more positive! ๐Ÿ˜‰)



๐ŸŽ A's ACTION


Today, every time you pick up the phone, or you're about to go on a Zoom call, take a moment to check in on yourself:


๐Ÿค” what am I feeling?


๐Ÿค” what am I thinking?


๐Ÿค” is it HELPFUL to me?



Just start by noticing.


Remember, self-awareness is the first step ๐Ÿ˜Š




๐ŸŽ Second, B is for BRAIN ๐ŸŽ


It's sad but true: your brain is not always your friend... ๐Ÿ˜”


But this isn't because you are flawed, or "wrong" - it's simply biological.



The brain's primary purpose is to keep you alive, so you can spread your genes ๐Ÿฃ


It has evolved to be successful at this by keeping you away from things that threaten you.



Think of the negativity bias:


โ—๏ธ humans are proven to remember negatives more than positives.



And you can see why this would be the case:


which is more important to your survival -


๐Ÿ… remembering where the sabre-toothed tiger's cave is?


๐ŸŒผ or the field of pretty flowers...?



The problem is that the brain misunderstands what constitute a threat.


These days, situations that feel threatening to you include giving presentations, asserting your opinion in a meeting, going for a promotion... ๐Ÿ˜ฌ



So your brain tries to keep you safe - by keeping you small.


It throws up negative thoughts to keep you away from this "dangerous" stuff.



But YOU get to choose which thoughts you allow to take space in your brain! ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ช


Remember, thoughts aren't REAL - they're just thoughts.



๐ŸŽ B's ACTION


When you get a thought that is potentially unhelpful to you (see ๐ŸŽ A above), question it.


๐Ÿค” "Is that REALLY true?"


Most of the time you'll find it isn't... ๐Ÿ˜‰




๐ŸŽ C is for CRITIC/ CHEERLEADER ๐ŸŽ


โ€œStaying out of judgement [is] not easy when you enjoy it as much as most of us do...โ€


So says the wonderful Brenรฉ Brown ๐Ÿ˜



The problem is, all too often weโ€™re not just judging others - weโ€™re also judging ourselves.


(Especially when we have Imposter Syndrome...)



That voice in our heads is a terrible Critic: belittling us, condemning us, undermining usโ€ฆ ๐Ÿ˜ฉ


But it doesnโ€™t have to be that way! ๐ŸŒŸ



You can learn to quieten that Critic, and replace it with a Cheerleader voice instead, encouraging you on ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ’ช



๐ŸŽ Cโ€™s ACTION


Practice โ€œsituationalโ€ rather than โ€œpersonalโ€ judgement.


โŒ Instead of, โ€œshe was late because she doesnโ€™t care about meโ€ (personal)โ€ฆ


โœ… โ€ฆthink โ€œshe was late because she got stuck in traffic/ her babysitter was late/ she lost her keysโ€ (situational).


In other words, itโ€™s not about YOU.



๐Ÿ”ฅ Give the benefit of the doubt - and not just to others, to yourself as well ๐Ÿ˜Š


Remember, most of the time, youโ€™re doing the best you can ๐Ÿ˜


So keep telling yourself thatโ€ฆ ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ช


With much festive love until next week (and D-I in the Advent Calendar)๐Ÿคถ๐Ÿ’–


Kirsten xx


p.s. I'd love to hear your thoughts on my Advent Calendar - you can email me on kirsten@kirstengoodwin.co.uk ๐Ÿ˜Š


p.p.s. if you can't wait until next week, follow me on LinkedIn and get your updates daily! ๐ŸŽ


ย